Thursday, 2 June 2016

Originality Deficiency Syndrome (ODS)

Some friends you see as rivals or competitors aren't necessarily so; I call them contingent-friends. Theirs is a genetic condition I discovered and coined as: Originality Deficiency Syndrome (ODS).

They will lurk around you to be like you in every way possible. Their wishes are at the mercy of everything you like and do. When you go shopping with them, they will buy exactly the same as your shopping cart, or even beat you to your choices. I used to hate that shit, and that's because I hate to look like someone else. I don't even wear "Ashobi" or "Aso Ebi," except against my will.

Me? How I deal with such friends may seem incredibly ruthless but effective. If I know you suck at embracing your uniqueness, I will make sure when I am going to get stuff for my consignment business, I take you along, to a family shop that is, and make it look as if I am shopping too. I will make you buy what you don't need; that way you lose because ' man suma dereum bi du gaynal gaal gi' (my money stays in the family).

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