People change...

Every self is said to have a sort of split personality: a selfish as well as a selfless self. Conscience we believe is what dictates which of these two sides will have its way in our life, at every given moment.

But I'd say as long as there isn't money, belief, love, or the need for self-preservation to prevail upon you to change your mind. So, everyone - even I am capable of being changed, and I yes, I think I have changed, again!

Chowli chowli...

Gambia - the occasional excitement in public feelings is understandable. Ours is a country being ushered into 21st Century freedoms and politics eighteen years later.

So, I think we want to belong so badly; we want everything in place at once, and that's what I have a problem with, because we tend to discount the baselines that we are working with.

Word...

If you truly want to understand a person, consider things from his or her point of view. Communicate. Ask that context be unpacked if necessary. Opinions are usually dependent on perspective. So, what looks like a “9” on a table will look like a “6” to someone sitting across your end of the table.

Screw GIMPA. Go to MDI....

Gambia -  what the Management Development Institute (MDI) cannot give you at reasonable cost, the Ghana Institute of Management and Public Administration (GIMPA) certainly wouldn't.

Man, not everything beyond borders is perfect. In fact, a true mark of independence is trusting one's own... y'know, holding onto one's own values and journey in order to have control of the process.

Fasting is a shield...

"Occasional religiosity" is what they'd call your sudden grace. Don't mind the trash talk. Change, lasting a month, or approximately so, is better than continuing decadence.

At least each Ramadan is a potential turning point. It's indeed a shield, and perhaps living like it's Ramadan willingly ever after will help sustain the newfound restrain and discipline.

Mtcheew!

The €1.45B pledge by the EU and the scary analysis is evidence that college education doesn't hold monopoly on knowing, nor on wisdom, political or economic intelligence... on bureaucratic excitement and getting enslaved by formalities perhaps.

But of course, nothing new, especially about contemporary academia. I have seen tutors who know all the books but do not know book, like people once thought mentors becoming jerks, and I have seen onetime idiots come round, take initiatives as if the prophesied return of Jesus Christ.

See the formation of the Gambia's 2016 coalition government for instance, where names that were thought unfit to be named in the same sentence with the choicest triumphed, fating the supposed intelligentsia to grief, unceasing anger, and denial, like: where the hell did we go wrong. I say the size of your ego and the arrogance thereof played you.

The Gambia and sports...

Being an ex-athlete myself, watching the Senegalese World Cup team on LOBS TV, like it was done for Gorgui Dieng on TFM, and the wrestlers on 2STV makes me want to be Senegalese.

Theirs is unlike our half-hearted media; they embellish the stories behind these athletes so much you're mesmerised, and that's a good thing.

In the Gambia that Badou Jack comes from, certainly not devoid of athletes, what our media does is invite talentless experts on TV to talk about how "we need to develop grass roots sports."

I say fcuk that! Make the grass tops attractive for a change and see if the grass roots wouldn't be inspired.

Believe in qadar and envy don't add up...

One: you cannot call yourself a good Muslim if you do not believe in qadar (Divine intervention in the affairs of humans, fate, or predestination).

Two: your Islam is deficient if you believe in qadar and all that, yet envious; like painful desirous of the excellence or good fortune of another, maliciously grudging if you like.

And three: if the above are all correct like I think they're, it's more than safe to say that many a contemporary Muslim ayard is in need of some serious soul searching. Fortunately, there cannot be a better time than Ramadan.

Rant...

Of all the things bastardised in this country, the word "competency" takes the cake. But even astounding is it coming from country-derailing almost-educated nitpickers who cannot even roll a joint, let alone manifest knowledge, skill, or attitude in anything they claim certification for.

Do not take luck for diligence...

We are sometimes so forgetful; we take luck or favours for diligence, then we claim supremacy about it, and bully those who aren't as lucky with our timelines, as if standards by which all successes must be measured.

The general implication is that to become somebody, you dare not think outside the box of two:

Get a degree and become an academic supremacist, or travel abroad and come back a "semester." Novelty, nada, because everyone holds the same mindset... I don't.. that's because my being one of us is what I think it is: a geographical accident.

If for purposes intended, take it...

Suruwa'l ko: 'Gaache reye na hajj fa beye di daahay saacha.' (Shamed is the dog where the goat fends off a thief). So should be the nigglesome intellectual élite of this country.

If you think our government shouldn't take grants or go for loans, and you're the cream of the crop, stop creaming our crop with specious arguments and give us proper alternatives or forever hold your peace.

Even I know that national reconstruction and wealth creation has to start somewhere. And if the endless speech-recycling workshops, seminars and study tours aren't taking us far, maybe we should do like Europe did.

As mighty as they once were, Europe never felt big after WWII's destruction of their infrastructure, productive capacity, housing, etc.

They knew they needed help, and like allies are for, there was the Marshall Plan: an American initiative, in which they were given over $13 billion in economic assistance. Now look who's laughing... did that assistance make Europe kiss America's behind?

So, given where we are coming from, how economically malnourished we are thanks to a shitstem that arrested our development, I don't think our worry should be whether to take the money, but rather, what do we do with it.

The big fraud...

I believe the greatest fraud of all time was the replacement of our traditional trading and currencies (gold, silver, etc) with the introduction of banks, paper money, stocks, bonds and other investment instruments intended to increase at interest.

Seriously, think! How does one make a gain out of money, or money (spontaneously) generating money just like that; no underlying activity, no exchange for any tangible commodity, if not for interest (riba) at the expense of the poor borrower?

So the ones who got rich at it get richer, speculatively that is, because what they claim as wealth on paper is not up to the natural object at hand, while the poorer class keeps paying for money they didn't even owe.

And you wonder why the economic slowdowns, declining productivity, devaluing of financial institutions, the reckless and unsustainable money lending, and how some stock value can go up this minute and down the next minute, probably because America's El Diablo made some reckless speech against the North Korean brat.

But I guess it's now safe to say that sanity's in the air, and the introduction of Islamic Finance into their syllabus is nothing but a tacit return of the fraudulent shitstem to Sharia that was once frowned upon... way to go if you ask me.

Complexity is not as impressive as simple...

Complexity is not as impressive as we have been led to believe; simplicity is, and everyone loves simple. That's why informal is much loved; why barbecues are much livelier than galla dinners, and why when uptown kids go to the village, they don't wanna come back.

Unfortunately, we create complicated rules, oppress ourselves by them and don't even wonder what the hell is wrong with us.

Me? I'm glad I broke free from when I was three. So, if for instance, my being familiar with a certain dinner table set-up is what's gonna tell if I'm truly awake, I'd rather be taken for some primitive hunter eating bush meat round a campfire.

I refuse to go to have fun and not have fun, only because there's some idiot who's tryna see if I overstand a seven-piece table setting, or because everyone is looking at someone to take a first-course fork and knife for a main course fork and knife, or for a dessert/salad fork, or a coffee teaspoon for a soup spoon. Screw that!

Response to the missteps...

If we all knew then what we know now, things would’ve been different. I probably would’ve been on ESPN dunking on giants, or doctorated in nuclear chemistry. But truth is: shit always happens. We all make mistakes; it is part of what makes us human. Knowledge of the unseen is something that God has kept for Himself.

What’s in our strength and establishes character is how we act in response to the missteps and mistakes we make. Whether you’re wise enough to make your mistake a thing of reference or a place of residence, life will always go on. So, use it as reference – you know: learn and grow than dwell in the misery.

Here’s how the little things we share on here matter:

I found this quote: “Givers need to set limits because takers rarely do.” According to the author, the givers are the selfless people: those who always put others before themselves. They give, share knowledge, mentor, listen to people's problems, etc. Takers on the other hand are those who will get as much as possible from others without giving anything in return - expediency over principles and consideration I’ll call it.

Now, given my upsetting history with being selfless, and I'm sure the price that many of you have paid for being altruistic round here, I realised that this quote was exactly what I needed, and trust me, for the first time in many years, I think I'm ready to break free from being invested in adorations that are not taking me anywhere. No, it wouldn't affect my generosity towards essential dependents. I got this!

As for the Gambia, and perhaps because of our solidarity in poverty, and how we encourage idleness in the name of patience and faith, we don’t want to talk about these things lest we be judged as arrogant (dehfa bhew/fuuy), but we have to. We don’t want to ‘gantu’ (say no), but sometimes we need to – it’s self preserving. We don’t want to be seen as bad, but who is good in a society where doing nine good things for people but one mistake qualifies you as wicked, eh?

Fascinated by the topic, I had to check who to ascribe the origin of the quote to. Irma Kurtz and Henry Ford both came as sources, but I also came across another piece on LinkedIn, on the same subject, published on October 16, 2015 by Cathi Bew, a Professional Tarot Reader, and I couldn’t stop nodding my head in agreement. I had to ‘follow’ her and share the piece. She said:

“We all know the “takers” in our lives, don’t we? The people who always want somebody else to do what they may be too lazy to do themselves. Always short of money although not when it comes to the luxuries in life. Expecting others to drop whatever they’re doing and rush to their aid.

I could go on but I think you’ve all got the picture and already have images of people like this familiar to you popping into your head? I know I have. I speak from experience when I say it’s not easy to break the pattern of always saying, “Yes, of course” but, trust me, it can be broken.

Ask yourself if they would do the same for you? No? Then up to you to establish boundaries. The next time the “taker” asks you for something, take a deep breath, and say “no” and mean it. They won’t like it but at least it will let them know that the “worm has turned” and is not always ready, willing and able. After the first refusal, you’ll find it gets easier to say no and, hopefully, they will get the hint and find another mug‘er “Giver” and leave you alone = result!

To become...

Some people take time to grow into things. If you're not a heart reader or a seer to know their prayers and plans, cut them some slack and let them grow at their pace.

See, some people become just like that. Other people become, misbecome and soon unbecome. Some become, then unbecome, and rebecome.

So, the timing of you becoming what you're, be it you graduating, securing a job, getting married, living a bigger life, or whatever, shouldn't be the standard by which someone else's is judged.

Differences in opinion is no hatred...

Supporting someone or wishing someone the very best doesn’t mean you cannot have differences in opinion or thought on some issues and policies.

In fact, I believe it’s only in THE GAMBIA ON HERE that that kind of objectivity is at best interpreted as hypocrisy, and at worst hatred.

But that’s why truth and honesty hardly exist in feelings on matters – and it’s perhaps why some people are as fickle as my onetime date that I eventually figured has never been attracted to the same guy for more than a week.