Prayer!

He knew the prayer of an established nemesis will certainly not be sincere, so he also faked his ‘Amen’ and said: “Yalna la YaAllah feye sa khol” (May Allah reward your heart). Powerful prayer, but the man didn't say Amen and you know why - because the prayer used in response to his prayer could be positive as well as negative depending on the construction of his heart.

That’s it! Prayer should not just be a formal procedure to be recited or observed on a Friday or a Sunday only. It shouldn't be limited to a particular time or a select place. Everywhere can be a holy ground and everyday can be a holy day. But most of all, prayer has to heartfelt. Meaning, it has to develop from the need to wish for others what we wish for ourselves. Anything less than that is but a means to stagnation.

For my part, I don’t care if the one praying for me is a Jennifer, Lucifer, Muta or a Mufti looking person. The supposed grace of the wisher is not what matters; looks can be deceiving, and that’s why God listens to hearts. That's why today’s prayer is a paraphrase inspired by brother @luciano and it is as follows:  

Lord, give us strength to tarry on and to carry on life's road.  Give us strength to carry our loads and to do thy holy word. Give us strength to make our stand above the sinking sand. Lord, life has become a burden, systems have become evil and we know many are trying to leave you out of their lives, but we wouldn't be so unwise, and so we promise to serve thee with our all and we’re begging thee mercy, Amen!

Findings of the study that I am yet to do...

According to the study that I am yet to do, there are six types of celebrities on social media, but for the time being, I will talk about the established two and defer the rest until the study’s done.

Celebrity number one can be anyone who’s sufficiently famous and usually celebrated for something noble; someone whose record and daily life attracts public interest and sometimes scrutiny because the person’s expected to be a role model. These public figures don’t seek attention; it is attention that seeks them. And most of them have fan pages founded on need and managed by fans or paid PRs.

The second set consists of those celebrities that create a fan page after reaching 5000 stalkers. And they tend to feel more celebrity than discernible public figures, even though they can’t be counted on to do anything; they can’t even cook. They’re probably only physically endowed and they flaunt it knowing that they have it, probably a generous share of attention-grabbing package, including full lips, beautiful skin texture, round behind, etc.

With a camera 360 backed selfie showing such gifts, it is natural to get an arsenal of bouncers, mostly pro-package young men. These guys are usually all over social media religiously defending these random hot chicks. They could even suppress their sincere opinion on issues in order to please a cutie and in return for nothing more than a virtual hug and a kiss to their name. For instance: “Awww! Dear Omar you’re so sweet. xoxo or mwah!”

But let me warn you! You’re bound for some serious keyboard warfare from these tough guys if you attempt to not condone the silly ways of such ladies. In fact thank God I have my own back otherwise I sure was going to get a hell of an ass-whooping after publishing this piece.

P.S - don’t take me seriously. You know I am all for anything that floats boats, but usually I am serious when I say I am not.

‘Brokaosis’

Seeking to lighten the burdens of other people, helping out or getting involved in initiatives that will benefit your society is only right. I call it ‘personal social responsibility’. But, those whose burdens are being made less burdensome must also be able to tell between kind gesture and obligation, but unfortunately most of us can’t.  In our midst are people whose only ability is the ability to receive and to live happily at the expense of other people’s toil. If you ask me, except your life is as selfless as that of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh), I am saying separate yourself from such people.

You owe nothing to a people who cannot even wish you well if you‘re nothing and that’s not uncommon here. Even religious people tend to pray for those who’re affluent and they’ll tell you that prayer is bought, but they fail to realise that benefit has to be caused by an investment of some resource. If what you give is what you get, then expecting from someone you’ve never been there for is not unlike a castle in Spain.

Until you’re seen to be doing well, until you go against all odds, break out of that mediocre social position that they had predicted for you, until you mount that social ladder that they thought wasn’t for your type, you’ll be considered a nonentity and will remain irrelevant until you’re able to create a new identity for yourself.

If you want to be treated like a hero, you got to be able to pay their bills. And that’s the time you’ll know how related you’re. That’s the time they’ll try to detach you from your family and from genuine people who were there for you. They’ll try to foster ties that never were, but only to feed on it. They’ll freely surrender their will and be subjects to you. They'll act helpless without you, but for as long as they’re living off you.

This is why dependent relatives of successful people do not only extend to the extended family, but even beyond the extension of the already extended family. So your mother’s kindergarten classmate’s niece, your uncle’s neighbour, your father’s sixteenth cousin, your grandma’s childhood friend’s adopted daughter, the son of your grandpa’s namesake, etc; all of them and their wasteful desires will become you responsibility and failure to meet their terms is translated as stinginess, even if you genuinely don’t have it.

It has an effect and I think I have found a new word for it. The word is ‘Brokaosis’ (brəʊk’əʊɪsɪs). It’s a noun and an ailment to be precise. It’s a chronic fever caused by impulsive dependency. And it is infectious because the givers that are being used will bleed dry and become users too, thereby rendering everyone within their circle broke. And we’ll all know the cause, but hypocrisy will not allow anyone to talk about it. Some will hate it when others prey on others but justify their own hunt. Sad!!!

Things change!

Growing up as friends and classmates, it was Ous, Saul, Bax, Lamin and Buba. But unlike Buba whose dad was a very humble cobbler by trade, Ous’s father was a top civil servant, Bax and Saul’s were successful businessmen and Lamin’s was a doctor.

These were the days when Deutschland was the thing, when every youth’s desire was to travel, come back as a “semester,” own a BMW or 190E Mercedes-Benz, be dressed in specially selected sport shirts and Chewan jeans (turned up preferably), neck and ears full of jewelry, pull on Nike, Timberland or Fila boots. You know that kind of tough-guy image that affords you respect regardless.

To come to the point, all the four friends except Buba had assured hopes of going abroad immediately after high school, because their fathers were seemingly well-off. Buba couldn’t even state his eagerness to travel without someone mockingly reminding him of his humble background. And that kind of shit happens all the time, sometimes you look at a certain peer and consider your background stronger.

At the last part of their high school years, poor Buba got hold of an anonymous sponsor, but he kept it behind the scenes. So when the others are blowing their proud horns, he kept his cool, knowing what he knew. Immediately after high school, the secret benefactor decided to support Buba’s trip and then phew, he left for foreign.   

I could tell the full story if I have time, but to be brief, Buba is now abroad and he’s living a bigger life according to the grapevine. Meanwhile, onetime confident Ous, Saul, Bax and Lamin have had at least three entry clearance rejections each. And ironically, Buba that they thought was a hopeless case paid some of those wasted visa application bills.

So you see how different the day of planning can be from the day of battle? See how unpredictable conditions can be? See how a poor peasant could turn out to be the mighty prince? See how being the first dancer or laugher doesn't mean you'll dance or laugh last? Haven’t you heard that success is like the swing of a monkey because the monkey hangs on any tree?

In conclusion, it is never a wise thing to consider your thirst quenched simply because you have a cup in hand. Remember that there’s many a slip between that cup and your lip. So in case yours is not unlike the mind-set of Buba’s friends, please consider this piece against your delusion.

Be your child’s primary motivator....

Your child, perhaps after reading about Michelle Obama tells you: “Dad, when I grow up, I want to go to Princeton or Harvard University” and all you can say is: “C'mon, child, let me think about putting food on the table first?”

Do you know what you just did? Your stressful mood just screwed a determined kid out of her dreams. Now if she grows up to be a no-hoper, you cannot blame anyone but yourself.

In this practical joke of a world, it is a blessing to have a child like this; one who knows what she wants to be and wouldn’t settle for the least fulfilling option, even if considered adequate. And that alone should motivate you to help this child to stand out to demonstrate merit, promise, and the need to be accepted at Princeton or Harvard.

As stressful as your life gets, you still got to do your best and let God handle the rest, but never limit the prospect of a child. And that’s not uncommon here. The other day I overheard two parents playing cool because their kids have only just graduated, took hold of a ‘mansa-kunda-dokuwo’ and have since then relieved them from ‘depanz’, but is being a ‘depanz’ successor all there’s to this increasingly tough world?

Personally, I have not gone beyond high school and even though I play cool and make it feel like shit’s perfectly all right like that, I still pray to God that my kids will not stride that path. I don’t want them to go through the same daily struggles I face to pull myself up on these cold-blooded streets, but if they are street smart like I think I am, then that’s a bonus, but they got to be learned. So help me God!

Cc: parents, should be parents, could be parents and could’ve been parents, and even would-be parents.

A short note to self!

I don’t know when you intend to start trusting yourself or appreciate the fact that you’re considered necessary. I don’t know when you intend to stop trying so hard to please or be appropriate for everyone, but even if you’re going start as early as tonight or as soon as tomorrow morning, know that it’s still tardier than you think.

You can improve the world or worsen it, but improve it...

“You are here to make a difference, to either improve the world or worsen it. And whether or not you consciously choose to, you will accomplish one or the other.”  Ever since I came across this quote by Richelle E. Goodrich, it became not only an inspiration but a needed reminder that my life could be as positive as I want it to be.

It backs up the fact that anyone can improve or worsen the world, and none should underrate his or her ability to do so, because you don’t have to be an important person to improve the world around you.  From you, the world needs nothing but a good intention and a generous heart, and the rest will naturally follow. But if you want to impair the world around you, all what’s required is a bad intention and a grudging heart, and then all the other vices will follow.

If you ask me, the world wants you to be focused and mindful in the midst of commotion. Be honest in the midst of falseness. Accept criticism even with the adversarial nature of humankind. Be responsible in the midst of irresponsibility. Contain your ego even if others are filling theirs with air. Strive against lust and wickedness even if others are caught up in the errors of their ways.

And the world wants you to constantly appraise yourself against these expectations, knowing how natural it is to do things that are ethically inadvisable. It’ll help bring you back to reality and open your eyes to the fact that your life is at times not what you actually thought. It can bring about emotions like guilt, shame and remorse, lacking which can make you think you’re perfect and therefore see nothing you’ve done that needs correction.